Sunday, June 22, 2008

meeting boys; pros and cons

what i like about meeting new boys:
  1. there's always something that initially sparks my interest. he's cute and there's something 'je ne sais quoi...' about him. usually it's in the eyes or the smile. or maybe he's got adorably curly hair, or he's ridiculousy funny. (or all of the above... ahhh, dreamy.)
  2. knowing that he feels a spark... he brushes my hair off my face, maintains eye contact longer than technically necessary (but not so long that it's uncomfortable or creepy staring)
  3. there are compliments, playful joking about how I have internal glittering of the soul, and again, brushes my hair off on my face, twice in less than 2 minutes - not that I'm counting... that he knew my name, or remembered my name and was curious to know more.
  4. that I remember that I am an attractive woman that guys do feel compelled to talk to and impress. It feels good and really doesn't happen often enough. It definitely motivates me to get out more.
  5. See part b of con #1
what i don't like so much about meeting new boys:
  1. working up the energy and fighting the overwhelming (and, let's face it, silly) fear before approaching or re-approaching the guy you've been introduced to because you told your friend (and everyone else) he had to introduce you because you thought he was very cute and wanted to meet him. (This actually becomes a plus when you do make your approach because whatever the pay-off may or may not be, the satisfaction of actually accomplishing it is a high that is not easily exceeded.)
  2. the high energy required to maintain his attention and curiosity can be exhausting, and is depleted as the night passes, the beer continues to flow... and when the night is an odyssey of epic proportions that goes on till the wee hours and finally ends at 5:30 (when you leave to get on the dreaded vomit comet which should really be avoided at all costs...) It's inevitable that your charms will wear off - as does your make-up - and you will start doing and saying stupid things that are decidedly lacking in internal glitter of the soul.
  3. (really 2b) If the night really goes on too long without any physical acknowledgment of the spark, the banter drags on and at a certain point you just get bored of it. It becomes transparent that he is now practicing his comedy routine on you and he can't or won't turn it off and be real with you. So if you want to continue talking with him, you're going to have to reciprocate the routine-ness and on-ness. And let's face it, by 5 am you're exhausted and it's starting to grate. Like, "I'm not even going to get a kiss (read: the killer make-out session that you had foreseen 5 hours ago) out of it now after all of this fucking work."
So maybe these cons are the reasons that I don't go out more, but I do think the pros make it worth it. And I guess it is good to stay sharp at playing the games that boys play. Plus it really is fun, no matter how it turns out.